Double Standard Vocabulary [Effortless English DVD1 > LV2 > 02]

Hello! Welcome to the vocabulary lesson for Double-Standard. Let's get started. First,  in the title says, “family is uneasy when one sister dates others ex-lover”.

“Uneasy”. “Uneasy” means uncomfortable, an uncomfortable feeling. it's a… it's not a specific feeling, it just means a… a little bit uncomfortable, not quite right, some thing’s a little wrong. So you say, “Oh I feel uneasy!” It doesn't mean… it's not a strong emotion. It's kind of a week emotion. Just means “Oh something's not right”. You feel a little bit uncomfortable.

Sometimes people will use this word to describe their stomach. Maybe they eat too much food, and say, “oh my stomach feels a little uneasy!” Alright, its feel a little uncomfortable. It's not you're.. not seriously sick but it's just a little bit bad. So, here's his family is an easy. It just means the family's not really, really, really upset, but they feel uncomfortable because one sister is dating another sister’s ex-lover. Okay.

That's (ahmmm..) going to the letter now. This woman's writing about and her sister Jane and she says,  “Jane has.. had numerous affairs…”

“Numerous” means many. Numerous is.. many. So, she says “many affairs over the past several years”. Now “affairs” usually means… an affair usually means that you are dating somebody but you're also already married, or you already have a boyfriend or girlfriend but, then, you're dating another person secretly usually. That's usually what affair means. To have an affair. However, in this letter, it does not mean that (Ahm..) this woman's a little bit older. His writing this letter, and, so affairs what she means is just (ahmm ahhmm..) lovers. So this woman is dating other people having boyfriends and he's having sex with the boyfriends. So she says “affairs” to mean boyfriends and having sex.

And you know again at San that's kinda van word that (ahmm..) older people might use in this situation.  I think most are younger people (ahmm..) would not use the word “affair” to describe that. They would just say “boyfriends” or “dates”.

Okay, but anyway.. (Ahmm..) moving on and she said that (Ahm..) after her third divorce; her sister’s third divorce, she was involved in an intimate relationship with a man named Will.

“Intimate relationship” means a.. (ahmm..) a.. serious (ahmm..) boyfriend or girlfriend. “Intimate” means close, emotionally  close. So, you're… you're.. you're… have a strong feelings for          each other. An intimate relationship also has the idea that (ahmm..) sex is involved. You're having sex with each other, but it's more than just that. Sex is involved, but also emotional connection, too. So intimate relationship with Will.  So, she.. she had a close relationship with this man, named Will.  

And it lasted about three months.

Now to “last” when used as a verb means to continue, or to continue until. So “lasted about three months” it means it continued for three months; continued until three months and then finished. So it gives the idea duration how long something happens. Ahmm.. “the movie lasted two hours”, it means it was two hours long.  Alright. The past tense (ahmm..) normal form in the verb is to “last”.

 Alright, and then after three months they broke up and her sister decided it wasn't what she was looking for.

“Wasn’t what she was looking for”. Or “isn't what she is looking for”, or “isn't what I am looking for”, it means (ahm..) not what you want, not what she wants. So, “it wasn't what she was looking for”, it means this man, Will was not the kind of guy she wanted. Not the guy she wanted; not what she was looking for. So, “not what you're looking for” means not what you want.

Okay. And that is the end of the first paragraph. Willing to the second paragraph, this woman now, the woman is writing me (ahh..) the letter. She started to date Will after her sister broke up with Will. Then this new woman, the one is writing the letter, she started dating Will. And (ahm..) she actually said that she had dated Will in the past, before her sister Jane had become involved with him.

 To become involved with someone means to start dating them. So, you might say, (ahmm..) “I am involved with  her”, it means I am dating her her. Or you might say, “I became involved with her two months ago”, it means you started dating her two months ago. So, to become involved with somebody means to start dating them.

 Okay and then.. next sentence she says, “we weren't intimate at that time”.

Okay, so she’s saying in the past, in the far past her and Will we're not intimate. Now in this case, “intimate” again. It does have an emotional idea of being very close emotionally. But it definitely has a sexual idea, here, in this situation, “we weren't intimate at that time”, means they weren't kissing each other, they weren't having sex, they.. it was.. it wasn’t a intimate relationship. Alright. They were dating but maybe just casually, not so serious in the far past. And then her sister, Jane started to date Will. And Jane and Will broke up. And then finally this woman started to date Will again. (Kinda complicated American dating situation in this letter.)

Alright. So, she says (ahhh..), “this time we start to dating again. And this time we have fallen in love”.

 To “fall in love” means to start feeling love for somebody. Romantic love.

Okay. And then she says.. her problem, there's always a problem in these letters, “my problem is that Jane is upset that I'm dating Will. She says I have betrayed her.”

To betray someone means that they are your friend or your family, or they are on your side, and then you do something bad to them, you cheat them or hurt them. And we say this is… “betrayal” is the noun. The verb is to “betray”.  So, to betray somebody it means they were your friend, they wear your close, a family member, they trusted you and you cheated them or lied to them, or did something bad to them.  So, you cannot betray enemy. Alright.  it's.. it’s somebody hates you and you hate them, and you do something bad to them. That's not… that's not betray, right? Because they know you want.. you hate them. Hhhhhhh.. It’s somebody who likes you, and you like them, but then you do something bad, and they're surprised. That’s “betray”, the verb to “betray”.

Okay! So her sister, Jane thinks, “Oh, you betrayed me! You’re dating my ex-boyfriend!”

 Alright. And then she said that her family also (ahmm..) feels uncomfortable. They say it's weird, it's strange. “Weird” means strange. It’s strange that she's dating her sister's ex-boyfriend.

 Alright.  Finally she says (ahh..), I have always been the good girl in the family and I have bowed to their pressure,

To bowed to pressure. Bow to someone's pressure, or bow to the pressure it means that you do something that other people want you to do. “Pressure” means people are telling you to do something.

For example, (Ahm..) you say, (now…ahmm…): “AJ, AJ go to the store”, “AJ go to the store, go to the store, go to the store”.

I’m say: “Oahmm.. No, I'm tired. I don't want to go to the store.”

– “Go to the store, go to the store, go to the store..”.

You keep telling me, you are pressuring me. Using it as a ver pressuring me, pressuring me “Go! Go! Go! Go!”

And finally I say, “Okay. I'll go to the store. I bow to your pressure.”

Alright. You're telling me to do something. I don't want to do it, “no, no, no”, and finally I say “okay I will do what you want me to do”. We call that bowing to pressure. To bow to pressure.

So she said… you know, when her family complains, she usually bows to their pressure, she does what they want her to do.  Even if she'd really doesn't want to, she'll do what they want. She bows to their pressure. But she says, “this time will is special..”  Something special and this time she won't budge. And she says also that her parents and her sister won't bugde.

Okay. “Won't budge” means won’t move or won't change. “Budge”. To budge means to move, and it really means to move a little bit. To move a little bit. So it's a there's a big big a rock, huge rock. And you're pushing it (gruhhhhh…) you’re trying to move it. You're pushing it, pushing, pushing it.. (ughhhhh). But it  doesn't move, not at all, not one centimeter.

Then you can say, “Oh, this rock won't budge”, “This rock won't move. Not even a little bit.”  So it won't move at all. But we also used.. now we also use “budge” to mean change. Change your mind, change your opinion. So, you say, “I won't budge”, it means you will not change your opinion, not at all , not even a little bit.  He won't compromise, nothing.

Alright.  So that is… and she signs it, wants, will in Walla Walla, Washington. Walla Walla, Washington. Walla Walla is the town in Washington State. (In the northwest part of america). And (uhhh…) this time, I'm… I including Abby's answer. I usually don't.  So I want you to think about your own answer, but this time including it has some good slang.

In (uhh..) her answer she says that she needs to confront the double standard in the family.

To “confront” means to (ahh…) go against, to directly fight against, or directly argue with something. To confront means you don't avoid it. And a “double standard” which (uhhh…) I'm using for the title of this letter, a “double standard” means you have two different rules, for different people. It's not… it's not a fair situation. For example, there's one rule for Jane in a different rule for the sister. So Jane is okay. She can date many guys. No problem. Her family says it's okay. It doesn't bother them. But then the other sister, if she dates many guys, they criticize her. They complain, they say, “Oh, you shouldn't date so many guys. So jane can date guys, the other sister cannot.

It's a double standard, right? “Double” meaning “to”. “Standard” means “rule”.  So “to rules”, “one rule” for one person, a different rule for someone else.        

Ahh.. In my family.. Well, we would complain about this a lot in my family. It Might me  and my sister. (Ahmm..) I was the oldest child… Still in the oldest child and ahmm.. my sister was younger, of course, and a girl, too. So sometimes my parents let me do somethings but they would not let my sister do it. So I could go out with my friends until midnight. That was my role. But, then my sister, they told her, “you must be back by 10” and she would get angry and say, “this isn't fair! This is a double standard!” Alright. There's a different rule for AJ and me. It's a double-standard not the same rule.

Alright, then we keep moving and (ahh..) we see the word “worldly” she says, “the parents…”, “your parents are worldly”.

“Worldly” means “experienced”. It means you have a lot of experience in the world. You know about the world, it's the opposite of naïve. We had naive in an earlier lesson. So “worldly” is the opposite of naïve. It means you.. for you have a lot of experience, you know about the real world.

And we see the phrase “turned a blind eye to”.

To “turn a blind eye to something” means you ignore it. You ignore it, you don't look at it, you don't think about it, you don't talk about it. If you turn a blind eye to something it means “are you ignore it!” Yo..you don't… you pretended it's not there. So (Uhmm..) they have turned a blind eye to Jane's dating. It means they've ignored her dating. So they can also do this for the new sister.

Alright. And then the last paragraph of the answer, ahmm.. she says “everyone should be able to get past it”.

To get past something, well, there's a direct meaning which means you.. you're moving and you pass. It means you go ahead of something, or you go by something. But usually using it in a general life to get past a relationship. For example, it means you are… you… the problem is gone. The problem is gone. The problem is finished. So you say, “Oh, the parents had a problem with this situation but they will get past it.” It means they will solve the problem, they will relax , hey will stop worrying about it.

So to… And if you say.. Ahmm.. maybe you had a relationship and you broke up, and you’re very upset, “Ohh huh! Huh!h huh!” You’re upset! But then six months later you feel okay. You can say, “Ah, I'm finally passed the relationship.” Or “finally passed feeling sad.” Means you.. It's gone now. You don't feel sad and terrible anymore.

And then the final sentence we see the phrase “people pleaser”. Abby says: “you don't need to be a people pleaser all of your life.”

 A people pleaser.. “Please” means to make happy. So a “people pleaser” is someone who always tries to make other people happy. They never make themselves happy, they just try to please other people. Always do what other people want. But never what they want. That's a people pleaser.

Alright, that is all of the vocabulary for this “dear Abby, letter”. Go on to the mini-story and listen to this a few times if you need to.

Oh and I almost forgot we have a contest right now. A remix contest. What I want you to do is that download a vocabulary lesson then edit it. You can change it. You can add music. You can add stuff in your own language. You can do anything you want. You can cut parts. But edit it. You can use audacity software which is free. Do a Google

search for audacity: A-U-D-I-A-C- I- T- Y. And “remix” means a reach change my ahhm… a vocabulary lesson. Try to make it better. Okay! Bye-bye 

This vocabulary is typed by MT.Dang. Please do not use it in business. Nội dung bài Vocabulary được gõ lại bởi MT Dang. Vui lòng không sử dụng lại với mục đích kinh doanh - mua bán.Thank you!

    

Read More

Double Standard - Bài dịch [Effortless English DVD 1 > LV2 > 02]

Publish Date: April 8, 2007
Ngày gửi: 08/04/2007  
FAMILY IS UNEASY WHEN ONE SISTER DATES OTHER'S EX-LOVER.
GIA ĐÌNH KHÔNG THOẢI MÁI KHI MỘT CHỊ EM HẸN HÒ VỚI NGƯỜI YÊU CŨ CỦA MỘT CHỊ EM KHÁC. 
DEAR ABBY:
Abby thân mến,
My sister, "Jane," and I are both in our mid-50s. Jane has had numerous affairs over the past several years after her third divorce, and was involved in an "intimate relationship" with a terrific man, "Will," that lasted about three months. 
Em gái tôi Jane và tôi đều đang ở khoảng tuổi 55. Jane đã có nhiều mối tình trong vài năm qua sau cuộc ly thân lần thứ 3 của cô ấy. Và đã quan hệ thân mật với một người đàn ông tuyệt vời tên "Will" được khoảng 3 tháng. 
Jane broke up with Will several months after she decided he wasn't what she was looking for, and she's presently engaged to be married to a very nice man ("Sam") and seems very happy.
Jane chia tay với Will được vài tháng sau khi cô ấy khẳng định rằng anh ta không phải mẫu đàn ông mà cô mong đợi. Rồi không lâu sau đó thì cô đã đính hôn với một người đàn ông rất tốt, (tên Sam), và có vẻ như họ rất hạnh phúc.
I dated Will several times before he and Jane became involved. We weren't intimate at that time, and we started seeing each other again over the last month. This time we have fallen in love.
Tôi đã từng hẹn hò với Will vài lần trước khi anh ta và Jane đến với nhau. Chúng tôi chưa xảy ra chuyện thân mật gì vào thời điểm đó. Và chúng tôi bắt đầu qua lại với nhau lần nữa hơn một tháng trước đây. Lần này, chúng tôi đã yêu thương nhau.
My problem is Jane is upset that Will and I are together and says I have "betrayed" her. She is worried about having her former and current lovers present at family gatherings, and our parents are also concerned. 
Vấn đề của tôi là Jane thấy khó chịu khi Will và tôi ở bên nhau, và nói rằng tôi đã "phản bội" cô ấy. Cô ấy lo lắng về việc có mặt người tình cũ và người yêu hiện tại trong những lúc họp mặt gia đình, và bố mẹ của chúng tôi cũng rầu rĩ về việc này.
They say it's "just weird." The fact that my sister was intimate with Will doesn't bother me or Will, but it sure bothers them.
Họ nói điều này không hay lắm. Sự thật thì việc em gái tôi đã quan hệ với Will không làm tôi hay Will bận tâm đâu, nhưng chắc rằng điều này đã làm phiền họ.
Abby, I have always been the "good girl" in the family and bowed to their pressure, but my relationship with Will is more than I could have ever imagined, and I don't want to give up my future happiness just to make my sister and my parents more comfortable. 
Abby, tôi luôn là đứa con gái ngoan ngoãn trong gia đình và biết vâng lời của họ, nhưng mối quan hệ của tôi và Will là điều gì đó hơn thế mà tôi chưa bao giờ có thể hình dung được. Và tôi không muốn từ bỏ tượng lai hạnh phúc của mình chỉ để làm em gái và bố mẹ hài lòng.
My adult children have all met and approve of Will and our relationship, but Jane and my parents won't budge. Any suggestions?
Các con đã trưởng thành của tôi đều đã gặp và chấp nhận Will và mối quan hệ của chúng tôi, nhưng Jane và bố mẹ tôi sẽ không thay đổi đâu. Bạn có lời khuyên nào cho việc này không?

-- WANTS WILL IN WALLAWALLA, WASH. --
-- Ước mong có Will tại Walla Walla,Wash(ington). --


-------------------------------------------------------------------------

DEAR WANTS WILL: 
 Người mong muốn Will thân mến,
Perhaps it's time to stop being the "good girl," begin acting like a woman who knows what she wants, and confront the double standard in your family.
Có lẽ đã đến lúc thôi làm cô con gái ngoan rồi đấy. Hãy bắt đầu hành động như một người phụ nữ.. người biết rõ những gì mình mong muốn, và kháng cự lại với sự bất công trong gia đình mình đi.
If your sister was "sophisticated" enough to have serial affairs, and your parents have been so worldly they have turned a blind eye to it, then they should all be adult enough to realize that you are entitled to your happiness, too.
Nếu em gái cô đã là người tinh tế đủ để có một chuỗi chuyện tình, và bố mẹ cô đã quá từng trải việc đời mà họ còn vờ như không thấy, thì họ cũng phải đủ trưởng thành để nhận ra rằng cô cũng cần có quyền quyết định cho hạnh phúc của mình.
 Although this may make for some awkward first few family gatherings, as grown-ups, everyone should be able to get past it. But if they can't, you are going to have to decide whether you want this man, or to be a peoplepleaser for the rest of your life.
Mặc dù điều này có lẽ sẽ gây ra sự ngượng nghịu cho vài lần đầu họp mặt gia đinh, nhưng dần dần đi... mọi người sẽ có thể lãng quên được điều này. Nhưng nếu họ không thể, cô cũng sẽ phải đi đến quyết định là cô muốn người đàn ông này hay muốn trở thành người đi làm hài lòng người khác cho phần đời còn lại của mình.

Translated by Betty and edited by MT

Read More

Bad Choices Vocabulary [Effortless English DVD1 > LV2 > 01]

Welcome to the vocabulary lesson for Bad Choices. Let's get started.

This is actually not a doc.. “dear Abby” letter. It's a “dear doctor Tracy” letter. Another advice column but.. same idea. So here we go. Okay, first of all in the beginning we see the word “divorced”.

Of course “divorced” means you're not married anymore,  you were married and then you broke the married, now you are divorced.

Okay and then.. ahhh.. we see the word “approximately”.

“Approximately” means… uhmm.. about, almost, kind of. So, she says, “We've been… I've been divorced for approximately three years”. Means about three years, not exactly three years, but, you know, close to three years.

 Okay, and she said when she met her new boyfriend, she said they hit it off very quickly.

 When you talk about people hitting it off, or to “hit it off”, it means you like each other ahhh.. very quickly. So, go to a party, you meet someone new, and you say “Wow! we hit it off”,  it means you started talking and immediately, or very quickly you liked each other.  So that's to hit it off. Sometimes it use with dating, sometimes just friendship, it’s fine also.

 Okay. Ahmm.. And little bit letter in the paragraph she says she found out that her boyfriend was fooling around with someone else.

Now in this case is a situation fooling around…ahhh.. in a dating situation means ahmm.. not basically having sex with somebody. And it has an idea very casual, it's not a see deep serious relationships.  So you can say, someone asks you, “are you dating”, “are you dating that person?” And you say “no, no. We're just fooling around”. It just means you're just having fun, maybe having sex. but that's all.  It's not a super serious relationship.

So, her boyfriend was fooling around with someone else. She found out that he was having sex with somebody else. And of course she's not happy. Alright,  and she… but then she says, “I figured that since we didn't have a committed relationship”.

That it was no problem. “I figured” means I thought, I sometimes was. “I figure this is a good thing to do”, it means I think it's a good thing to do. To “figure” means to think . It has other meanings, maybe to…but in this case, in usually, it’s kinda casual way to say think, or believe.

Okay and then she says she figured she had no place to say anything, because they did not have a committed relationship.

A “committed relationship” is a serious relationship. When you say “I am only with you, you're only with me”, that's a committed relationship.  If you're married, that's a committed relationship. Give a very serious boyfriend or girlfriend,  that's a committed relationship. It's not just fooling around, it's a committed relationship. Serious.

So she said, “we didn't have a committed relationship. So I had no place to say anything”.

To “have no place to do something” it means you have no good reason. So, “I had no place to say anything” means I have no good reason to complain, to say something to him, to complain “oh, why are you with that other woman?” Because they did not have a committed relationship. She had no place to say something to him, to… to complain. She had no good reason to complain.

Alright. And I… she's mentioned in that first paragraph also that ahmm.. she found out that this guy, her boyfriend went with another woman to the… his family reunion.

A reunion is kinda be meeting. But it's a meeting of people from your past. So a “family renion” means all of your family members come together, and they meet one-time. Not just your a close family. Not just your mom and your dad, a brother or sister. It also means ants, uncles, cousins, your really big family. Probably you don't see them a lot, depends… And I guess some people live near there their big families. But in america most people don't live near there extended families, their big families. So they have a family reunion sometimes. Where all the family, the cousins, the ants the grandparents, the uncles. Everybody gets together at one time. That's called a family reunion. SO it’s a family reunion.  “A family reunion”. Alright!

So, they must move on to the next paragraph for the vocabulary, Ahmm… She says, “I guess my issue is the fact that now I'm still in his… this relationship”.

She still with him.  Ahmm… She says, “My issue”, “I guess my issue…”

“My issue” means my problem. “Issue”… sometimes means topic. but also sometimes it means a problem. Especially in relationships or psychologically mentally. If we say, “I have issues”, or “I have an issue”, then usually that means I have a problem. Alright. “I have a problems”.

So she says, “I guess my issue… (Ahmm)… is the fact that I have a child with him now, and this… all this stuff is still happening tonight”. She says, “I guess my problem” , this is her problem, her issue or problem.

Okay. So, she still dating him but she says, “I brought a child into this nonsense”.

So she's dating that… her boyfriend. Her boyfriend has another woman and now they have a child together. It was complicated.  Ahmm… Anyway. She says, “I brought a child into this nonsense”.

So “brought a child into” means just cheat gave birth.  She… she , she had a baby and now the baby is in this situation also. The child is in this situation. And “nonsense” means.. (Ahmm..) something. that's …(Ahmm..) foolish, stupid, (Ahmm…) crazy. So in this case, “this nonsense” means “this crazy stupid situation”. So now there's a child involved in this crazy situation, in this nonsense. “Nonsense”

 Okay and..then (Ahmm…) She says that (Ahmm…) the boyfriend always makes an excuse…

His eyes making excuses. An excuse is a reason for doing something that's wrong. Alright. So, If you're late to class and I say, “why are you late?” And you say, “Oh oh oh… the.. the bus was late!” That's your excuse.

Alright. It's the reason you did something wrong. Being late to class is wrong. It's not a big wrong. Well, it's a small thing. But still it's a mistake or something wrong, and I your reason for doing something wrong is called an “excuse”.

She says, “Oh the bus is late”, that's your excuse, that's your reason for doing something that's bad or wrong, or criticized.

 Alright! And…ammhh a little *of *the *letter *on*… second paragraph she says, “I have dealt with him taking women to hotels, and my gut tells me it was her.”

Okay, “I have dealt with”.  To deal with something, to deal with the situation, to deal with the person, it means you keep trying to solve problems. In that situation you don't quit but you also don't solve the problem. So it's… it really has its idea. Continuing to survive, or continuing to try. Usually it… some difficult situation.

So she says, and in the past tense is “dealt”, present tense’s “deal”. So, to deal with somebody means they're difficult but chill deal with them. You… you keep trying to talk to them or communicate with them. If you deal with a difficult situation it means you survive this situation. You keep trying in this situation. You probably don't solve the problem completely but you also don't quit. You deal with it. Past tense is “dealt with”.

 So she says, “I have dealt with this difficult problem”. Ahm…(it’s actually present perfect anyway)... “I have dealt with him taking women to hotels”.

So her boyfriend takes other girls to hotels and she is… she's dealing with this. So,  she has dealt with this. So, It means it’s keep… keeps happening and she keeps trying to survive the situation, but she can't.

Another… another ahhh… word or phrase with the same meaning is to handle, to handle a situation, to handle a person. So she could say, “I have handled him taking women to hotels”. Same basic meaning is “dealt” or “deal”.

Alright. And then she says in the same sentence, “my gut tells me it was her”.

“Her” means his ex-wife (This one…this one person). “My gut tells me” means you have a feeling, a deep feeling about some information or something. So, “my gut tells me it was her” it means she has a feeling, a deep feeling that it was this other woman. But she really doesn't know. A “gut feeling” or “to have your gut tell you” it means it's not your brain, it's not your logical normal brain, not your normal mind, it’s not that you have good information or you see something happen, or you thinking clearly. It’s a, it's more of an emotional, deep instinct, a deep intuition, a deep feeling. That something is happening or something is wrong.

So, “my gut tells me it was her”. She just feels, she feels it was this other woman. Alright, she's not sure. She didn't see the other woman, but she feels it, feels it deep down.

And “gut” means stomach. Alright, “gut” means stomach. So it means my stomach tells me, my gut tells me. So it’s a deep feeling about something inn..intuition.

Alright.  And in next paragraph, starting in next paragrahp she says, “I have tried to get over all the cheating”.

To get over something..  Of course it has a direct meaning but in this kind of, it also has a… a..  another meaning in…  that is to get over means to ahhmm forget, or to forgive and forget. So, I've tried to get over all the cheating…”  “cheating” of course means him seeing other women. So, she's tried to forget it. She's tried to get over it. She's tried to forget it and not worry about it anymore.

“To get over”, “to get over someone”, for example the event ex-girlfriend you break up and after one month you're still very sad, “Oh, I’m so sad!” Alright, you can't get over her. But after six months, you feel OK, you forget her, it's.. it's no problem ,if you see her, you.. you're not upset. Then you can say, ” Ah, I got over her (past tense). Alright, I got over.

Okay and a bit letter in next paragraph you see the word,” I stand up for myself”, against his family, I stand up for myself. To stand up for yourself means you fight for yourself. Now it could mean really fighting with your… you know hitting and kicking, but usually just means arguing. So if someone does something bad to you, you won't let them do it, you will say “hey, stop doing that!”,  “Don't do that”, that's called “standing up for yourself”. I stand up for myself means I fight for myself. I argue for myself. I am strong for myself, I don't let other people attacked me, or treat me badly. I stand up for myself. And I'm not sure she really does, but anyway I stand up for myself.

Okay! And then a little bit letter she says, “I guess the bottom line is knowing how much he still sees his ex-wife and that there's all this bad stuff happening with the child.”

The “bottom line” means the final problem. Or that conclusion maybe say “the bottom line is I'm really angry”, that means.. that's your your final point. That's your main point, that's your conclusion. So, maybe I talk a lot about many many things  finally, my conclusion, my main point is that I'm angry. “The bottom line is that I'm angry”. The bottom line is your main point.

 Alright, let's keep going. I'm any says, “I cannot stand her..”

This other woman. He cannot… she cannot stand her. If you can't stand someone, or can't stand something it means you hate it. You say, “I can't stand English”, it means you hate English. (Of course that's not true!) But anyway, he says, “I can't stand Tom Cruise”, it means you hate Tom Cruise. So, you can't stand something means you hate it.

And then a little bit letter she uses the phrase that “he wants to have his cake and eat it, too”

“To have his cake and eat it, too” or “to have your cake and eat it, too”, this means you want two things but really you must choose one.  Alright, so if you have your cake, you keep your cake, then you can eat it, because if you eat it, then it's gone. Aright, it disappears, it goes to your stomach. Now you don't have it anymore. So if you have a cake you can keep it, you can keep it, it looks perfect, everything's perfect, or you can eat it. Alright, you can eat it and then it's gone. But you cannot eat it and keep it at the same time. It's impossible. So, this phrase, “to have your cake and eat it, too” , it means.. it describes the situation where (ahmm..) you want two things, but you really can only have one of them.

Another example are you go to a store, you have an i.. you want to buy an iPod, and you have a hundred and fifty dollars.  And you say I want to keep my money and I also want the iPod. Well, it's impossible, right? You can only have one. You want to have your cake and eat it, too.

Okay. Later we see the word “paranoid”. “Paranoid” means you're scared have everybody and everything and you think everybody wants to hurt you . You think everybody wants to cheat you or hurt you. That paranoid.

And we see the word “animosity”. a little bit later “animosity” is a feeling that you don't like somebody. It's a feeling that somebody is your enemy. He says, “I have animosity towards him” it means you think he is your enemy. You feel he is your enemy.  “Animosity” means a feeling that someone is your enemy.

And finally the last paragraph we see the word “dire”. “Dire”, “dire” means very difficult or high dangerous, or terrible. Like a dire situation is a very risky difficult situation. Maybe.. maybe dangerous, or maybe just risky. Means it's… its easy to fail . It's easy that something will bad, will happen. “Dire”. A dire situation.

A “dire need” means you have a terrible need, you really really need something or else you will suffer, or something bad will happen.

And finally the last two phrase: “to hook up with somebody”

She says, “I'm… she always hooks up with bad man”. To “hook up with” means to connect. Now it can just mean to meet, “I'm going to hook up with my friend at the movie”,  that means you're gonna meet your friend at the movie, but it can have a dating meaning. You hook up with somebody it means you connect with them, and you start dating with.. dating them.  Or you I just have sex with them. He says “I hooked up with his girl at the bar”, it means you met the girl at the bar and you probably went home and had sex. So, to “hook up with” means to meet somebody. But it can also had this idea. Just.. I'm meeting someone in having sex with them.

Alright to “hook up with”.

Let's move on to the mini story now. 

This vocabulary is typed by MT.Dang. Please do not use it in business. Nội dung bài Vocabulary được gõ lại bởi MT Dang. Vui lòng không sử dụng lại với mục đích kinh doanh - mua bán.Thank you!

    

Read More

Bad Choices - Bài dịch [Effortless English DVD 1 > LV2 > 01]

Những sự lựa chọn tồi tệ

Publish Date: April 6, 2007
Ngày gửi: 06-04-2007
Dear Dr. Tracy,
Tiến sĩ Tracy thân mến,
I am a 33 year old divorced woman with four kids. I was married for 12 years and I have been divorced for approximately 3 years. I met my new boyfriend during my divorce. We hit it off and have been together ever since.
Tôi là một phụ nữ 33 tuổi đã ly hôn, có 4 đứa con.  Tôi từng kết hôn được 12 năm và tôi đã ly hôn được chừng 3 năm nay. Tôi quen biết người bạn trai mới của mình trong thời gian ly hôn. Chúng tôi tâm đầu ý hợp với nhau và đã luôn bên nhau kể từ đó.
He is a 44 year old divorced man. When I met him he had been divorced for 2 years. Well, I met his exwife and she seemed to be an okay person.
Anh ấy là một người đàn ông đã ly hôn, 44 tuổi. Khi tôi gặp anh thì anh đã ly hôn được 2 năm. Tôi đã gặp vợ anh ấy và cô ây có vẻ là một người khá được.
What I found out 3 months into my relationship with him was that he was fooling around with his ex-wife again-- who also at this time had a boyfriend of her own.
Những gì tôi tìm hiểu được trong mối quan hệ suốt 3 tháng của tôi với anh ấy là anh đã gian díu với người vợ cũ của mình lần nữa - trong thời điểm này cô này cũng đã có một người bạn trai.
I figured that since I did not have a committed relationship with him, I had no place to say anything.
Tôi đã nghĩ đến điều đó từ lúc tôi không có một mối quan hệ chính thức với anh ấy. Tôi đã không có quyền để nói lên bất cứ điều gì.
The problem is it continued further into our relationship, up to the point when I found out I was pregnant. At the same time I found out that he and his ex-wife planned to go to his family reunion together.
Vấn đề là mối quan hệ của chúng tôi đã tiến khá xa, và thời điểm này tôi nhân ra tôi đã có thai. Cùng lúc đó tôi phát hiện ra anh ta và vợ cũ dự định đoàn tụ gia đình với nhau.
Of course before all of this, I drove by his house one night and saw her car parked outside his home. The excuse I got after all of this was that they were considering getting back together. I thought it was very funny that as soon as she met me, she found interest in him again.
Dĩ nhiên sau tất cả những điều này, tôi lái xe sang nhà anh ấy vào đêm nọ và thấy xe của cô ấy đỗ ở ngoài. Lý do mà tôi nhận được sau tất cả là họ đang cân nhắc việc quay lại với nhau. Tôi nghĩ thật buồn cười khi mà sau khi cô ấy gặp tôi, cố ấy lại thấy hứng thú với anh ta lần nữa.
I guess my issue is the fact that now I am still in this relationship. I have brought a child into this nonsense and I hate the fact that he keeps in contact with her. My boyfriend has taken responsibility for her son from a previous relationship.
Tôi đoán vấn đề của tôi là sự thật rằng tôi vẫn đang trong mối quan hệ này. Tôi đã mang một đứa trẻ vào mối quan hệ vớ vẫn này, và tôi ghét cái sự thật rằng anh ta vẫn giữ liên lạc với cô ta. Bạn trai của tôi đã chịu trách nhiệm với đứa con trai của cô ta từ mối quan hệ trước đó.
His excuse for having so much contact with his ex-wife is because of that boy. I know this is not true but I have no real proof otherwise. I have also dealt with him taking women to hotels and my gut tells me it was her, but he promises it was not her.
Lý do của anh ta về việc liên hệ quá nhiều với vợ cũ là vì đứa con trai. Tôi biết điều này không phải sự thật, nhưng tôi không có bằng chứng thực tế nào. Tôi cũng đã đề cập với anh ta việc anh đưa những người phụ nữ đến khách sạn và linh cảm nói cho tôi biết đó là cô ta, nhưng anh ta thề không phải cô ấy.
I have tried to get over all the cheating. I know that she is very close to his family and I also know that his family does not like me because I stand up for myself.
Tôi đã cố gắng quên tât cả sự dối trá. Tôi biêt rằng cô ấy rất thân thiết với gia đinh của anh, và tôi cũng biết rằng gia đinh anh không thích tôi vì tôi luôn đứng về phe bản thân mình.
I guess the bottom line is knowing how much contact his ex-wife has with him and the fact that he knows I can’t stand her.
Tôi đoán điểm mấu chốt là vì biết vợ cũ của anh liên lạc nhiều tới mức nào với anh, và sự thật là anh biết tôi không thể chịu đựng được cô ấy.
Am I in a weird relationship with a man that wants to have his cake and eat it too? Or am I being paranoid and need to trust him when he says he does not want her. I have never had so much animosity towards two people in my life. I do love this man, but I feel like I have put myself back in an unhealthy relationship with a man that is trying to lie to me.
Có phải tôi đang mắc trong một mối quan hệ định mệnh với một người đàn ông muốn giữ lại chiếc bánh nhưng lại muốn thưởng thức nó? Hoặc có phải tôi đang bị hoang tưởng và cần phải tin tưởng vào anh ta khi anh ta nói anh ta không  muốn cô ấy. Tôi chưa từng có quá nhiều sự thù oán với 2 người trong cuộc đời mình. Tôi yêu người đàn ông này, nhưng tôi cảm giác như thể mình đang lặp lại một mối quan hệ không lành mạnh với một người đàn ông đang cố gắng lừa dối mình.
To be totally honest, now that I have his child I even hate the fact that he helps her son. She never has to ask for anything regarding that boy, but I have to constantly remind him when our son needs something. 
Thành thật mà nói bây giờ tôi đã có con với anh ta, tôi thậm chí ghét cái sự thật rằng anh ta giúp con trai cô ấy. Cô ấy chưa bao giờ yêu cầu bất cứ điều gì liên quan đến thằng bé đó, nhưng tôi phải nhắc nhở anh ta thường xuyên khi con chúng tôi cần gì đó.
He does it for the other boy without thinking, but my son is a second thought even when I have said, “Look at your son. He is in dire need”. I was married to a cheating man and hooked up with another cheating man. I wonder if it’s just my bad choices in men.
Anh ta làm điều đó cho thằng bé khác mà không cần suy nghĩ, nhưng con trai tôi chỉ là sự quan tâm thứ 2 mặc dù tôi đã nói, " Nhìn con trai anh kìa. Nó đang rất thiếu thốn".   Tôi đã kết hôn với một người đàn ông không chung thủy và đã say mê một người đàn ông không thung thủy khác. Tôi tự hỏi liệu đó chỉ là những sự lựa chọn tệ hại của tôi đối với đàn ông?

Read More

The Race Vocabulary [Effortless English DVD1 > LV1 > 08]

Hi! This is the vocabulary lesson for The Race. Let’s go through the story slowly and talk about some of the vocabulary. Alright. The Race. 

“It's five o'clock and Alan (Alan the name. of course) is riding his motorcycle in San Francisco. He is driving down Van Ness Street.”

Van Ness is also a name. Of course. And we say, “driving down”… down, we sometimes say, you know. He's going up the street, or he is going down the street, and sometimes that means… maybe going up a Hill, or down a hill. Sometimes it means… you know… north and south… You know… you going up the street. It might suggest you are going North on the street.  If you, “say go down Van Ness”, it might mean go south on Van Ness, or it might mean go down the hell. Here, at the top Van Ness Street and you're going to go down, meaning down a long hill. So that's why we say sometimes to go up or go down a street. Here it means going down a hill. Van Ness has a big hill. So, Alan is at that top of the hill.

“And he is riding down Van Ness Street, and he comes to a stop light.”

A “stoplight” is a traffic light. Of course. (you know) Green, yellow and red. Sometimes we say “traffic light”,  but sometimes, we saying “stoplight”. Same, they're both the same. “Stoplight” or “traffic light”. Okay.

“A red Ferrari pulls up next to him”.

“Ferrari” is the name of a car. of course. So, Ferrari is a very fast car, made in Italy “Ferrari”, I think most of you probably know what a Ferrari is. 

Okay! “Pulls up next to him”. To Pull up next to someone. It’s the idea that you… you… you come next to them. You were behind them and then you come next to them. So, you can imagine someone is at a stoplight, and another car comes from behind, and then comes and stops next to you, or next to the person. We say they pulled up next to you. They pulled up next to the person. It's an idea…, idea coming from behind to the side. 

So, from behind to the side of someone. So, a red Ferrari pulls up next to Alan. comes from behind Alan and then stops next to him. The driver is wearing dark sun glasses. Ok. The driver of the Ferrari is wearing dark sun glasses. He looks over at Alan. 

Okay. With… this is another to word verb “looks over”. To “look over at” is the idea that you look to the side. Alright.  You're looking sideways. Not in front of view. We know, if you say “look over”, you're not looking to the front. You're looking to the side. Alright. So, they’re next to each other and then

they look to the side, the driver turns his head to the side and looks at Alan. That is the idea to look over at someone. As the idea of looking to the side. 

Alan looks at him. Alen looks at the driver and realizes that the driver is Tom Cruise. Hummm bomb bomb bomb pom-pom pom-pom banana!! That's right, Tom Cruise is the driver of the Ferrari. Tom Cruise looks over at Alan turns to the side and looks at Alan. Tom sneers at Alan.

“Sneer”. To “sneer”, to “sneer” means to move your mouth…ahhhmm… and look kind of angry. Alright, it…it means a… maybe only one side of your mouth goes up. Alright.  It's kind of they have smile. So maybe the left side of the mouth goes up, but the right side does not move. So it is kind of have smile.  We call that sneering or to sneer. And to sneer, it usually means… ahhh… the person is angry or the person does not like you. it's… it's a negative, a negative thing to sneer.

Okay. So Tom sneers at Alan. Alright, he’s sneers at Alan and he says “ When the light turns green, let's race.”

Oh. So, Tom Cruise wants to race Alan on his motorcycle. Tom has a Ferrari car. And Alan has a motorcycle. Tom wants to race.

Alan says, “Alright. You’re on!”

“Your on” means… ahmm… I agree with you. Or it means I will do it, I will do what you said. I agree to do something. Usually we use “you're on” for a contest for competition, for some… something where one person will win and another will lose . For example, a race… some kind of difficult thing. For example, if you say, “A.J! I will give you one hundred dollars, if you swim 10 miles”. Alright, I will give you one hundred dollars if you swim 10 miles. And I say, I say “You’re on!” It means I agree. I agree to do it. I agree to do it. 

So, in this story Alan agrees.to race Tom. He agrees to do it. He says, “you're on! I will do it”. 

Then tom says, “I'm gonna smoke you. Sucka!” Hhahha Alright. This is slang. Of course, slang. 

Now “gonna” means going to. it's the future, the future tense. We say “gonna” in normal speech (We don't say “going to”, we say “gonna”).

Ahhmm… say *** I'm going to smoke you. I'm gonna smoke you. Okay to smoke someone is slang. It means to beat them. It means to win against someone. So we used it with the future a lot, “I'm gonna smoke you” means I'm going to beat you. I'm going to win and you are going to lose. That’s what to smoke someone means. especially in a race, we use it a lot with racing. “I'm gonna smoke you” means I will be faster, I will beat you. 

And then “sucka”, “sucka” or “sucker”. To pronunciations ,”sucker” or “sucka”. That’s a… it just means ahhmm… it’s kind of a negative name for somebody. It's a little bit like *** or asshole, but sucka is kind of week. It's…

it's not… it's a little negative. Just a little negative, but not… not so much. So, sucka is a little bit negative, but not terrible… not terrible.

Alright! Toms being a little negative. He said, “I'm gonna smoke you. Sucka!”

Alan says, “You wish.”

“You” mean… meaning you wish you would smoke me. You wish you will win.

Okay. But then he says… Alan says, “I'm gonna beat you and your sorry ass car!”

:))… “sorry ass” it’s also slang. Sorry ass, sorry ass car; sorry ass apartment; sorry ass job. Sorry ass means terrible, cheap, low quality, ss…not good. That…so we say sorry ass.

So Allen says, Oh. Tom, your car is nothing!  Your car is bad, your car is cheap, your car is low quality! Its a sorry ass car. Sorry ass car. 

Alright. The next line: Alan and Tom wait at the light. They rev their engines.

Okay. To rev an “engine”. “Engine” is the motor for a car or motorcycle, right? It’s the power for the car. It's the power for the motorcycle. To rev means to go *grumm…grumm…grumm… grumm…grumm…grumm… That’s reving the engine. Alright. You… you push the engine, so it goes fast, but you are not moving. Alright so you're pushing the gas grumm…grumm…grumm… but you also push the brake. So, no moving. No moving.  That’s call reving be engine. “Reving the engine”. You make the engine loud grumm…grumm… “Reving the engine”. 

So Tom is reving the engine of his Ferrari grumm..grumm…grumm…  Alan is reving the engine of his motorcycle grumm…grumm…grumm… and they are waiting for the light. Suddenly, the light turns green. Allen and Tom take off…

Okay, to “take off”.  To “take off” means to start quickly. Alright.  It means to go quickly or to start very quickly.  So to “take off”,  we use it… for example, when someone is stopped (they're not moving)… stopped and suddenly they move. Suddenly they go.  We say they take off. So, to take off is to suddenly move, or to suddenly start. 

Okay. So, they take off. The light turns green, Tom suddenly starts and moves his car. A…!! Alan… (humhum…not A.J. Alan). Alan suddenly goes on his motorcycle. He takes off on his motorcycle.

Okay. “Take off” has other meanings also. But here, it means to start suddenly.

OK. They zoom down Van Ness at top speed. To “zoom” means to go fast. It’s easy! To go very fast; zoom. To zoom. He zoomed down the road. He went fast down the road. So, they zoom, they go very fast down Van Ness at top speed.

“Top speed” means as fast as possible. It means fastest.

Okay. So, they zoom… they go fast down Van Ness. Tom Criuse is winning. But suddenly blue and red lights appear behind Tom. It's the police.  They pull him over.

Okay. To “pull someone over”. We use this phrase...  We use this with the police. When you are driving and the police come behind you. And they turn on their lights *freeww…  Then you must go over to the side. Alright,  you must stop your car. We say, “the police pull him over” or “the police pull you over”. Alright. To pull over with the police means the police stop your car. Alright. They pull you over.

So tom is going very fast. The police come behind Tom and a pull him over. Tom must stop.  

Alan zooms past Tom. Laughing…!! He yells, “Better luck next time!”

“Better luck next time” is an idiom.  It’s a common phrase. We say it a lot. “Better luck next time” means you failed the but hopefully next time you will do better. It's similar to “good luck”. “Better luck next time” is similar to good luck.

What's the difference? All the difference “better luck next time”, we use after someone fails, after something bad happens, we say, “Oh, better luck next time!” It means this time you failed, but next time maybe you will succeed, next time maybe you will do better. So, we say “better luck next time!”

Alright and finally the last sentence, “Alan is the winner”. “Alan is the winner”.

Okay! that is all for the vocabulary lesson for the Race.    

This vocabulary is typed by MT.Dang. Please do not use it in business. Nội dung bài Vocabulary được gõ lại bởi MT Dang. Vui lòng không sử dụng lại với mục đích kinh doanh - mua bán.Thank you!

    

Read More

The Race - Bài dịch [Effortless English DVD1 > LV1 > 08]

Cuộc Đua

It's 5 o'clock and Allen is riding his motorcycle in San Francisco. He is riding down Van Ness street and comes to a stop light. 
Lúc đó là 5 giờ và Allen đang lái chiếc mô tô của anh ta ở San Francisco. Anh ấy đang lái xe xuống đường Van Ness, và đang đến gần một đèn giao thông.
A red Ferrari pulls up next to him. The driver's wearing dark sun glasses. He looks over at Allen. Allen looks at him and realizes that the driver is Tom Cruise! 
Một chiếc Ferrari tiến đến kế bên anh ấy. Gã lái xe đeo một chiếc kính mát tối thui. Hắn nhìn vào Tom. Allen cũng nhìn hắn và nhận ra gã lái xe đó là Tom Cruise!
Tom sneers at Allen. He says, "When the light turns green, let's race". 
Tom cười khẩy vào Allen. Gã nói " Khi đèn chuyển sang xanh thì đua nhé."
Allen says, "Alright, you're on!" 
Allen nói, " Được thôi!"
Tom says, "I'm gonna smoke you, sucka!" 
Tom nói, "Tôi sẽ đánh bại anh cho mà xem, đồ rác rưỡi!"
Allen says, "You wish. I'm gonna beat you and your sorry-ass car". 
Allen nói, "hãy mong như thế đi. Tôi sẽ đánh bại anh và chiếc xe bẩn thiểu của anh."
Allen and Tom wait at the light. They rev their engines. 
Allen và Tom đợi ở cột đèn. Họ khởi động động cơ xe.
Suddenly, the light turns green. Allen and Tom take off! They zoom down Van Ness at top speed. Tom is winning. 
Bất ngờ đèn chuyển sang màu xanh. Allen và Tom phóng đi ngay. Họ phóng xuống đường Van Ness với tốc độ tối đa. Tom đang sắp chiến thắng
But suddenly, blue and red lights appear behind Tom-- its the police. They pull him over. 
Nhưng bất thình lình, những ánh đèn xanh, đỏ xuất hiện phía sau Tom - là cảnh sát. Họ lùa hắn vào.
Allen zooms past Tom, laughing. He yells, "Better luck next time!" 
Allen phóng qua khỏi Tom, cười to. Anh nói to, "Chúc may mắn hơn lần sau nhé!"
Allen is the winner!
Thế là Allen là người thắng cuộc.

Read More

Secret Love [Effortless English DVD1 > LV1 > 07]

WOMAN HESITATES TO REVEAL SECRET LOVE FOR COLLEAGUE

Người phụ nữ do dự việc bày tỏ tình yêu thầm kính với đồng nghiệp

DEAR ABBY:

Gửi Abby,

I am a single woman in my early 30s who has never been married. I recently fell in love with a wonderful man with whom I spend a great deal of time. He is unaware of the intensity of my feelings, and I'm afraid of telling him out of fear of rejection.

Tôi là một phụ nữ độc thân đang ở những tuổi đầu 30, chưa bao giờ kết hôn. Gần đây tôi đã yêu thích một người đàn ông tuyệt vời mà tôi đã dành rất nhiều thời gian. Anh ấy không hề hay biết những cảm giác mãnh liệt của tôi. Và tôi sợ nói ra với anh ấy sợ bị từ chối.

There are a couple of additional concerns: He is 15 years my senior and a medical doctor. I am a social worker in a lower economic class. In addition, we are of different religions, but we have similar beliefs and values. He is also my co-worker.

Có một vài bổ sung khác: Anh ấy lớn hơn tôi 15 năm tuổi và là một bác sĩ y khoa. Tôi là một nhân viên xã hội với mức thu nhập kém hơn.  Ngoài ra, chúng tôi còn khác tôn giáo nữa, nhưng chúng tôi có niềm tin và những giá trị tương tự. Anh ấy cũng là đồng nghiệp của tôi.

I am very interested in pursuing a deeper relationship with this man, but would like to hear your advice first. Thank you for your thoughts on this.

tôi rất quan tâm đến việc theo đuổi một mối quan hệ sâu sắc hơn với người đàn ông này, nhưng mong muốn nghe ý kiến của bạn trước. Cảm ơn những suy nghĩ của bạn trong chuyện này.

-- LONGING FOR MORE IN CHICAGO

- Niềm hao khát nhiều hơn, tại Chicago

Read More